Friday, November 17, 2006

Ending Chapters in Order to Begin New Ones

I was sorting through some papers last night and doing some serious recycling when I found a paper containing some wisdom appropriate for right now. It was computer generated so I either copied and pasted it before printing it out or retyped it. It's been long enough that I don't remember where it came from and I neglected to cite the source so I can't credit the author.

I did not write this; however, I am not getting paid for this blog so I feel okay to share it uncredited. I abridged it slightly, and added one phrase at the end.

Whoever did write it was one smart cookie.

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One always has to know when a stage comes to an end.

If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through. Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters - whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished.

You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened. You can tell yourself you won't take another step until you find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life have turned into dust, just like that.

Such an attitude will be awfully stressing for everyone involved; friends, family; Everyone will be finishing chapters, turning over new leaves, getting on with life, and they will all feel bad seeing you at a standstill.

None of us can be in the present and the past at the same time, not even when we try to understand the things hat happend to us. What has passed will not return; we cannot forever be children, late adolescents, children who feel guilt or rancor toward our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair.

Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away.

That is why it is important to destroy souvenirs, move, give things away. Everything in this visible world is a manisfestation of the invisible world, of what is going on in our hearts - and is getting rid of certain memeories also means making some room for other memories to thake their place.

Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss. To do so is only to poison yourself.

Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting what Is. Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to be finished. Tell yourself that what has passed will never come back. Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person - nothing is irreplaceable; a habit is not a need.

Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity, or arrogance; but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust.

Stop being who you were and change into who you are (and who you were meant to be).

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4 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are going to be OK. I promise. You know, I find I actually love living here now. I found a whole new life I never expected. You can do the same.

krista said...

Hi. You don't know me; I stumbled upon your blog from someone else's (which is I guess how these things go). THANK YOU for sharing this. Earlier this week I ended a relationship and I am struggling with how to move forward. I know you are dealing with your own emotions right now, but for some reason it feels like these words were meant for me, too.

Lady M said...

That was lovely. Best wishes on your move.

Kristin said...

I think the idea of looking forward... and letting life play itself out.